Often, we think about how much we would like to learn to play the guitar, take up knitting or write a novel. But many of us only dream about finding time for a new hobby rather than committing to making it a priority.
I’ve been saying I want to learn to speak Italian fluently for the last three years, but all I can manage is a few minutes of Duolingo each day—and when I travel or get busy with other activities, the first thing I drop from my to-do list is practicing my Italian. I haven’t even been able to commit to taking a weekly class.
So how can we make time for a new hobby? The missing ingredient could be motivation, says Jen Dulin, an executive coach and leadership consultant based in Lansdale, Pennsylvania. If we want our new activity to be a priority, we need to understand why we want to learn it.
“If our why is strong enough, we will figure out the how,” Dulin says. Without knowing our why, we are relying on willpower alone to keep us going, and willpower is often temporary and wanes over time, she says. Dulin recommends spending a few days reflecting on how this new skill or hobby aligns with your values and how it might benefit you over time.
After reflecting on my desire to learn Italian, I realized it might be difficult for me to maintain my motivation because I don’t have a trip to Italy planned for this year. But that doesn’t mean I should give up.
Here are six ways to stay motivated when learning a new skill.
1. Be patient
One of my biggest frustrations with learning to speak Italian is I want to sound like a native speaker, not an American trying to speak Italian. This has made me hesitant to practice my language skills with other people.
This gap between my expectations—that I will sound like a native speaker—and the reality—that I will sound like someone struggling to learn a new language—is common. We might be drawn to an activity like writing poetry or playing the guitar, but when we try to do it, we often realize we’re not good at it, says Grace Adele Boyle, a creative and executive coach in Nederland, Colorado. But being a beginner is part of the process of learning a new skill or taking up a new interest.
“Give yourself permission to be bad at it,” says Kim Childs, founder of Take the Leap Coaching in Arlington, Massachusetts.
2. Try new things
The first hobby you try might not be the one you stick with, so test out a few new activities until you find one that feels right, Childs says. “Give yourself permission to explore,” she adds.
If your hobby is meant to release stress, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to commit to an activity long-term. Especially if you don’t enjoy it, says Andrea Raggambi, chief success designer at PerforMore Coaching & Consulting in Falls Church, Virginia. For instance, you might think you will love to crochet, but then when you sit down to do it, you don’t enjoy it.
Keep in mind that a hobby doesn’t have to be an activity. “It might be something like mindfulness or meditation because you feel a lot of stress or because you want to learn how to make space and time to be present,” Raggambi says.
Once you find an activity you like and commit to it, then you can think about how to rearrange your schedule to make it a habit or to make time to practice it.
3. Start small
We often start out promising to commit an hour to our hobby every day, but that might not be realistic given other commitments to work and family. Start by doing a little bit a few times a week, says Katie Navarra Bradley, a business performance and executive leadership coach in Mechanicville, New York. “Set aside a small chunk of time for the number of days within the week that you feel you can commit to that skill, and schedule it on your calendar,” she says.
Set small, achievable goals. Maybe you want to knit an entire sweater, but you can start with knitting one square and learning a pattern, Boyle suggests. Set a goal of finishing that square by the end of the month.
When Dulin’s client wanted to incorporate time for exercise into his busy schedule, he established small milestones. Step one was taking his bike out of storage and setting it up. The second step was committing to doing two minutes on the bike at 5:30 a.m. for six days. His next goal was to wear a heart monitor and increase his time on the bike. His next goal was to increase the intensity of his workout.
“During that process, his identity started to shift from, ‘I can’t get myself to exercise’ to ‘I’m being consistent, and I am exercising,’ and for him, that was enough to get his habit and commitment started,” Dulin says.
4. Find pockets of time
A common barrier to starting a new habit or activity is believing we don’t have enough free time. To find time for a new hobby, Childs recommends thinking about whether you spend time on things you don’t really value, such as scrolling through social media, shopping online or binge-watching TV. Childs recommends identifying one evening or weekend afternoon that you will deliberately abstain from that activity and instead use that time to try a new activity like a yoga or painting class.
5. Enlist a friend
Sharing your hobby with friends is a great way to create a shared commitment, Raggambi says. “There’s something different that gets unlocked when we do that with another person,” Dulin says.
If you can’t get your friend to join you, ask if you can discuss your progress and share your milestones, Dulin says. Find someone to share your interests with who will ask you about your big and small wins and appreciate what you have done.
6. Reward yourself
After a few weeks, pause and look back at the skills you’ve gained. “Taking just five minutes to reflect on the amount of knowledge learned can help us see our progress and stay motivated to continue moving forward,” Bradley says.
Childs suggests writing a “ta-da” list of all you have gained from your activity. “Celebrate your courage, commitment and risk taking,” she says.
Your reward might be learning a new skill or finding a new passion. “If it’s a hobby you truly enjoy, and it’s something you have a lot of fun doing,” says Raggambi, “then that in and of itself should be a good motivator.”
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Lisa Rabasca Roepe is a Washington, D.C.-based freelance journalist who writes about gender equity, diversity and inclusion, and the culture of work.
Photo courtesy Chokniti-Studio/Shutterstock.com
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